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Where is the love? (3444 hits)


Today I did something that I haven’t done in at least a couple of weeks; and after reading the newspaper it made me regret doing it. It just pains my heart to continue to read stories of horrific events that involve our young people. A child getting stabbed to death by another child; another young person found dead to gunshot wounds. What is happening to our young people? How can we reach out to them, how can we show them another way of living out their lives? I look at my own life, and how I was susceptible to a life full of no hope. And that’s when I realized the reason why I am the man I am today. I had people behind me, a support system that refused to allow me to become another statistic or even another victim to societies dictatorship. So many of our young people do not have this support system that I grew up with. They look around and all they see is the so-called love that their “friends” are offering them. And with this so-called love from their so-called friends; they react to life in a more defensive manner.

It has been said that what one does not receive at home; they find elsewhere. So if we as parents are not showing our children the type of love that they require at home; then where do we expect them to get it? Why is that we as parents can continually push our children away, and then have the galls to blame society for their downfall? We need to stop blaming the educational system for our children’s failing education; when we decided not to take an active role in it. We need to stop blaming the police department for harassing our children who just so happen to be hanging on corners selling drugs or their bodies.

If anyone is to blame for the downfall of our children, then we as parents should take the heat. We have stood by for way too long watching as our children walked down those spiraling staircases. We always knew what awaited our kids if they dropped out of school. We always knew how hard life would get if our child got pregnant too early in life. We always knew that the grave or prison was a likely ending point for our child when we saw that gun hiding underneath their bed. We always knew because we already lived them out.

Some of us dropped out school and suffered for it; and yet we still allowed our child to do the same. We realized how hard it was for a teenager to raise a child on their own, and yet we still allowed our child to do the same. We’ve had friends that have died from gunshots, we’ve been sent to prison for drug offenses and yet we still allow our children to fall down that same path. What is wrong with our parenting? Why have we allowed love to slip away from our grasps?

The young people of today are in dire need of some love. As parents, it is our responsibility to introduce love into our homes. If love already exists; then bring more in. Our children deserve to grow up in homes where love resides. They deserve to have that ever so important support system pushing them along to a successful life. And we as parents deserve to see our children become the best that God would have them to be. Let’s bring the love back people!
Posted By: Bryan Patton
Monday, October 26th 2009 at 11:40PM
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Hi Bryran: Your blog has made a lot of true facts, and it's well received. I do think though, that love is a major factor in a child's life and whatever the cause the child goes astray is not always projected from a home enviornment. There's peer pressure, and even just a child's own personal views. Many children a totally support with love, still they are prodigal and leave what they've been taught. Some of course, never return and others find their way back. Parents who love always want their offsprings to be successful, yet when you have done what you can and your child does not become what you are expecting, doesn't necessarily mean they haven't been loved. The problem of violent children is in their own thinking, I truly believe this. If we as parents could keep their minds away from violence, there is a better chance we bestow love to help render them in better upbringing. Overall, I think your blog is helpful, but still your children are individuals and not matter how we give love, it's not always reflected in our children. Not to say it's impossible, I believe love is a cure, but so many of our children walk away from love and finding hate become overcome and lose their way. Enjoyed reading your blog.
Tuesday, October 27th 2009 at 10:08AM
MIISRAEL Bride
Brother Bryan,
I couldn't agree more with your blog. Parents have to take up the responsibility of training their children. There are just too many ‘dead beat’ parents out there not mention the fact that many are kids having kids at younger and younger ages and aren't taking responsibility for the rearing of their children mean while this doesn't keep them from having more children. Many grandparents are taking up the challenge and responsibility of raising their grandkids. It's a vicious cycle in the inner city that needs to change.

Miirael although you bring up some good points, I will say that in rare instances do kids who come from good homes with lots of love go astray permanently. These kids may be influenced or enticed by peer pressure, but at the end of the day they make choices that reflect the training they have received in the home. Charity starts at home and if we train our children, they'll always remember the training received. Ultimately it is a parent's responsibility to teach and steer their kids in the right direction...not the government or the schools. We can see the job that Social services and the Depart of Juvenile Justice has done with kids... Just my 2 cents worth

Tuesday, October 27th 2009 at 4:00PM
Jen Fad
Yes, Jen I agree with you. I was only giving another view of the few who do become prodigal and never make it back. Love lessons are important to our children, and let me also indicate that we should teach our children to love others. Loving others is not to do them harm, but to do them good. That Golden Rule is such a great reminder! Thanks for adding more good pointers Sister....That's good love!
Tuesday, October 27th 2009 at 4:31PM
MIISRAEL Bride
Hello to all,

I have a question that any one of you could answer if you like.

Firstly, Black Americans know that White Americans raised us, taught us everything that we know, taught us how we should believe in God and gave us our Christian religion and what ever our faults we have is because of how White America deliberately raised us to be the people we are today.

Now, we also know that White America owns the real estate of this country as well as runs this country, including us, Black Americans. Everything we eat and have is what White America provided for us to have.

We were born into slavery in this country and no other people had their hands on us except White America, am I right.

We, as a people are severely mentally damaged as an abused child would be that we blame ourselves for our conditions not realizing that our only escape is to desire to become a sovereign people or have complete independence from White America on a portion of this continent that we could call our very own country with borders to pursue life, liberty, happiness and prosperity in our own way.

Likewise, when a child abuse report has been made with Child Protective Custody the first thing the agency does is to remove the child from the abusive environment, am I right. In other words, we will always remain this ignorant and mentally damaged people that we are unless we become a sovereign people. We need God to do for us what was done for Moses and the Hebrew people when they were in bondage and in slavery in Egypt. We will become a sovereign people if you all could understand sooner rather than later the things I say.

Well anyway, here is my question, why it is that the children of White America do not have the problems our children has? If I am wrong about the things I say to you, then White children should he have been the same problems as Black children, but white children do not. We, as a people are subjugated and suppress which is not new news to any of you. However, we do not comprehend our situation because we are severely mentally damaged.

Tell me what you think, but please answer my question first.

Thursday, October 29th 2009 at 1:32AM
Harry Watley
What's up brotha Bryan,

I am from California too. I know well of this "straddling" of the line between Juvenile delinquency and Home Influence.
I think, sometimes it's just a matter of a few decisions that make the difference between incarceration, death or becoming a responsible person. I know really "smart" guys who had love at home but made wrong decisions.
I know it's prevalent in all of our communities across the nation though.
Thank you for this reflective and thought provoking subject.
Wednesday, February 24th 2010 at 2:36PM
Rick Robinson
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